Me me me me me!
I'm ascared. I'm leaving for Dallas in six days. Why am I scared? Well, leaving everything I know, for one. My friends, my family, my job. Why the hell am I doing this?
For love. For my future. For the chance to be with the man I love. To be emotionally supported by someone who has a vested interest in me. To have the chance at a life better than this.
You know, the past year and a half I have been doing what I never thought I could do. I got to know me. I've lived this time alone, worked for only me, spent a lot of time with me, went to the movies with only me, out to dinner with me, debated with me, snuggled with me, got drunk with me, drove around with me, criticized me, had sex with me, read with me (and without me reading over my shoulder). I wanted that for so long. And you know what? I've grown so much in this year and a half. Yes, in the poundage area, but mostly within myself. I finally feel confident in what I say, and I can actually admit when I'm wrong. And I know now that it's ok to not know it all.
I've expanded my thoughts, become more firm in my convictions. Learned to love people around me, even if we don't think the same way*. I'm more compassionate to those less fortunate, and I've realized how rich I really am. I have the best family, the most honest and loyal friends, and I have learned to chip away at the wall that I put up.
I am now ready for this. I can take on the world. I hope!
*I still hate republicans though.